One Saturday morning, when Ron and Harry were 25 years of age, they were out for a walk near the burrow. Abruptly Ron realized he was madly in love with Harry. "Why Harry! I'm in love with you!" he exlaimed.

"You are? That's great!" Harry practically shouted. "I just realized 2 minutes and 27 seconds ago that I was madly in love with YOU! It has been a long and hard wait for me, loving you and knowing you didn't return the feeling..."

"You poor thing. But your torment is over now! " cried Ron, even happier. "Now that we're gay and in a loving and mutually supportive relationship, we should head over to visit my family and let them know."

"Wonderful idea, my dearest love," replied Harry with adoring expression.

As they walked along they encountered Bill and Charlie, who had apparently randomly come home to visit as well. They were with their two friends, Bob and Joe. "Why hello Ron!" exlaimed Bill with happy surprise.

"Hello Bill! Charlie! Joe! Bob!" Ron greeted them. "Harry and I are just on the way to the burrow to reveal our newfound love for one another. I hope you don't have a problem with that?" he inquired, sparing them a glance before returning to gazing at Harry with helpless adoration.

"Mind?" laughed Charlie. "Why would we mind? Bob and I are on our way to confess our long secret love to Mum and Dad ourselves!"

"And Joe and I recently realized that we aren't enemies like we always thought, but are in fact soulmates," added Bill. "So I wanted to come share the news with my loving family and invite you all to the wedding next week."

"That's wonderful news!" said Ron. "Isn't it my darling precious harry!"

"Oh it is, my wonderful snugglebunny," Harry said enthusiastically. "We can all talk to them together!"

So the six continued on the way to the Burrow. But as they turned the corner, what should they see but Percy walking along hand in hand with Oliver Wood! Percy looked up and saw the crowd descending upon them and promptly fainted. When he was revived by his anxious boyfriend, he sat up, looked at them and muttered. "All right, I'm gay and dating Oliver. Anybody have a problem with that?" Oliver looked prepared to beat them all up.

"Why Percy, why should we mind?" asked Ron, aghast. "Why Harry and I have been in a loving and mutually supportive relationship for almost 15 minutes now!"

"You have?" asked Percy in astonishment.

"We're all gay Percy, we're on our way to tell mum and dad. Want to come along?" asked Bill.

Percy, further losing all resemblance to the cannonical character, promptly became downright jolly and sharing. "Sure, let's all go together! I love you guys!"

After the group hug ended they continued on their way, until they ran into the twins and their friend Lee Jordan sitting on the front lawn.

"Oi!" said Fred ('cause somebody had to.) "What are you all doing here together?"

"Oh," said Ron brightly. "Harry and I have found True Love together, and we ran into the rest of them on the way here, so we're all going to come out of the closet together! I hope that doesn't make you uncomfortable."

"Oh of course not," Fred said, with a surprised look. "I've been dating Lee since Hogwarts! I didn't know you guys were gay though! Huh, must be genetic."

Everyone looked expectantly at George, who flung himself upon the ground sobbing. "Alas, I lost my One True Love years ago! I will never be happy again, although I hide my pain behind this jocular facade!"

Everyone looked sympathetic as Fred mouthed the words "Cedric Diggory" and patted him on the back.

"So," said George, recovering as abruptly as he'd collapsed. You're all going to come out to mom are you? This I have to see!"

"Hey, I want to come out too!" cried a voice from the doorway.

"Ginny???" they all gasped, shocked.

"Well, for heaven's sake," she sighed, "you didn't think that 6 of the seven kids would be gay here did you? We're seven for seven!"

"Huh," said Ron.

"Who'd a thunk it," added Charlie, with a deplorable ignorance of British slang.

With a unanimous shrug all the younger Weasleys wandered into the house in search of their parents. Unsurprisingly, they found them in the kitchen. Probably because the Weasleys all shared a common terror of their living room. In the seven generations they'd been in possession of the house, not once had any weasley entered it. At any rate, they were in the kitchen at the table.

Everybody looked at Bill, silently electing him spokesperson. He gave an equally silent acceptance speech about what an honour it was to be chosen, and took a deep breath.

"Mum, Dad, we're gay" he said firmly.

"Yes, dear, I know that," said Mrs. Weasley.

12 jaws dropped. "But- but don't you have a problem with that? I mean, we're ALL gay! All of us!" Fred stammered.

"Why would we have a problem with that?" said Mr. Weasley "That would be a little hypocritical of us wouldn't it?"

"-hypocritical?" gasped Ron, who was finally catching on to the pattern here. Those Weasleys, can't get anything past THEM, eh?

"Well, of course! After all, I'm gay myself and have had a loving and mutually supportive relationship with Albus Dumbledore for many years now" came the reply.

They all turned to Mrs. Weasley to see if she was upset, but she smiled at them genially and said "Oh, Minerva is my one true love kids, don't worry about it. Now have some ice cream!"

Ron sat down and reached for the ice cream immediately, and the others followed. After all, it had all gone pretty well, considering.

"So, like, do we know anybody that's straight?" Harry mused aloud, accidently betraying his valley-girl roots.

"Hermione," said Ron.

"ummm.. nope," said Ginny.

"Oh. umm.. Neville?"

"Dating Colin Creevey" replied Harry.

"Your friends Dean and Seamus?" suggested George.

"Dating each other," Ron said absently. "I know, Draco Malfoy! No one could look that girly and not be straight!"

"He's been dating Justin Finch-Fletchly since 5th year," said Harry, grabbing the icecream out of Ron's grasp.

"Professor Snape," suggested Charlie with the air of one who knows the Caramilk Secret.

Mr. Weasley laughed till tears rolled down his face. "Please. He and Hagrid have been together 4EVER! They've even got those matching LOTR tatoos on their shoulders!"

Everyone pondered that statement for a moment and then mentally fled in horror. They went back and forth, naming everyone they could think of.

"Flitwick" "You know the little green guy with the walking stick that comes to visit every now and again? " "Oh."

"Professor Lupin" "Oh, he's married to my godfather now, didn't I tell you?"

"My Dad," said Harry, after a long pause as they all wracked their brains trying to figure out why only about 35 of the people they knew actually had names.

"Sorry son," said Mr. Weasley gently. "He and Voldemort used to be an item. But Voldemort's insecurities led to anger, and anger led to hate... and hate.... led to SUFF-ERR-ING."

"I never knew!" cried Harry in despair.

"Don't worry, I still love you," cried Ron.

"Oh, alright then." said Harry brightly.

"So bascially, I'm gay" Bill said slowly. "And you're gay" he nodded to indicate the group. "And really, all wizards are gay."

"Yup," said Ginny. "Pass the ice cream."

The End